That took a long time, young as they were the Sons Of The Rain completed their studies and swarmed out to different parts of the Netherlands, finding jobs and founding families. I was left alone with a partly finished concept, and in 1990 had my first severe attack of what is generally called Chronic Fatigue Syndrom. A giant hand swept me down, that’s how it felt, one day I was still more or less okay, the next day I could not even walk accross my room, every single bone and fibre of my body aching. Recovery was painstakingly slow, for three months I scampered about in my little apartment, and I couldn’t play a decent note, let alone sing.
Finally I managed to make some recordings on a minidisc, first playing, than singing, things I had always done simultaneously, and this was a learning process. I became aware of what I was really playing; having trusted the little engine that had never let me down before I had untill then performed by instinct, now I had to play note for note, becoming aware of all weaknesses and flaws , an interesting experience.
It took to 1992 to finish We Got Angels and I sent the CD to Radio Limburg. In april of that year Fons Geraedts came to my place with a portable Uher tapedeck, and we talked for hours, after editing there were 60 minutes of interview about the hows and why’s of the songs and about one month later they broadcasted the entire interview and after that, the entire CD, uninterupted – it was a little succes, my telephone didn’t stop ringing for a week, many little gigs followed, and suddenly everybody in Gronsveld where I lived, knew who I was. Still I didn’t fully realize what had happened; only years later it became clear to me that, rather than being a musician, I had discovered the writer in me.
Life happened, in 1998 I met Anet, my second wife, and she kept me busy writing lovesongs until she departed in 2004.
Anet was very ill (diabetes) when I met her, my friend Geoffrey Powell introduced me to her, and very soon we got together, we both felt we were meant for each other. Her doctor told me she was really in dire straits, not having much more than a year left in her. Love proved him wrong, one year became two, and finally six, one of the happiest times of our lives. We placed an invisible fence around us, with a door that would only open to trusted friends and my children.
From behind that fence came some of the best stuff I would ever write – it appaers that my decision to leave showbizz alone and totally dedicate myself to living with Anet made me more careless of what people might think of my music; not having to mind what the audience might need simplified my music, without fear of using cliche’s the lyrics came out in a natural flow – and she loved every bit of it. You’ll begin to see where I want to take you: not minding the starmaker machine the music and the writing improved, I was more productive then ever.
This resulted in 2 CD’s, “Indian Summer” and “On Air”, both still to be published, because the recordings were really crude and meant for personal use only. Various other projects became finished, “De Vlam in het Hout”, 3 instrumentals connected with sounds of nature (one augustevening in ’85 I had made recordings in the woods nearby, and some songs) and paintings, among which a series of 14 about the Passion of the Christ – I had made sketches in the early 90’s before I met Anet and written 14 poems to go with them, together it became a charming booklet that I gave to the Sisters of Emaculate Conception to be used in their work at schools – but this is an entire story in itself, I’ll tell you some other time about a period of depression and healing that took place, this all happened while I was working on We Got Angels.
When Anet went to the other side, even though I was prepared for this, a period of total silence followed, no words appaered, her spirit still hovering around me I took long walks, only a year later ideas came trickling through; in march 2004 mrs. Ding Zilin appaered on German TV, her hair had turned snowwhite, but she proudly spoke of her son and the foundation of The Movement of the 4th of June. This rekindled the old flame, I dusted off the tape with the BBC doc “The Gate of Heavenly Peace”, I cut little samples from the soundtrack, using 27 to make loops and soundeffects, added a guitartrack, loaded 2 CD players, 2 minidiscs and 1 DVD player, and, microphone in hand, I mixed in one take “Heavenly Peace”.
Then words flooded in, all by themselves, resulting in songs in Dutch, for the first time I expressed my feelings in my native language. This became “Onder de Maan”, Gaston and Tobi helped me to make a beautiful little CD we are very proud of.
Even then I didn’t mind the outside world, I still wrote as if living behind that safe little fence I talked about, but slowly we became aware there was something new: 3 men in a studio, carelesly experimenting with sounds and recordingtechniques. Gaston discovered that he is not just a soundengineer, he’s a producer, somebody who brings people together, makes them work together, having ideas we would never have had ourselves, but every time we followed his advice the music improved. Take it from me: he IS a producer, one of the finest you can imagine, and a true friend. I called the finished product “Dreimaen”, dialect for three men. We had amongst ourselves decided that, even though music is our medium, what really ties us together is a friendship strong enough to weather some heavy storms – you see, another thing More Important Than Music.
A few months ago I was again approached by the Sons of The Rain, they are all back living in Maastricht and sometime soon we’ll get together to speak of the songs that started it all, they told me that throughout the years they never stopped listening to the music and they still want to play it. They too have a friendship More Important than Music – this is what keeps us together, and I guess it’s why we still want to play, regardless of what any one thinks.What goes around comes around, today I watched the news and heard that Hu Jia has received the Sacharov Prize for Human Rights, having asked the International Community to investigate what really happened in 1989 he has been convicted of dissident activities against the Republic, serving a three year sentence in jail.
This breaks my heart, but if Hu has the strength and courage to run this risk, we cannot fail him and all these beautiful people who touched me so long ago and made me what I am; a man who refuses to forget. This is my drive: to let you and if possible the entire world, even all the way to China, know that we saw them; that, when hearing names I see faces, expressions varying from hope to despair, I even know what their voices sound like – even now I’m writing this I’m overwhelmed, they saved my life back then, now look what’s happening still, we cannot do nothing.
Some of you have heard some of my music, but did you pay attention to the words, musicians hardly ever listen to the lyrics, but I know they are powerful; two years ago they turned into graffity when Project Aware gave a party in the Westergasfabriek in Amsterdam, Charcoal en We Got Angels were projected on the walls, I have seen dozens of people spelling them out silently, taking their time – when these words work in silence, why are there so few people who hear them in song?
Nick McGrath, who wants to help me playing his beautiful bass, said to me the other week:”For the first time I find myself listening to lyrics, are you aware that, in various parts in the world, we may turn into personae non grata when we publish?” He wants to take that chance.
Bei Dao writes:“Words are the poison in a song” – look him up on Wikipedia and freeze at the power of his words, they cut so much deeper than anything I ever did, yet, even in my feeble writings, without knowing what I did, there seem to be echoe’s of what he writes, though I’ve never laid eyes on his poetry untill recently, when I was looking for a Photo to be used as a cover for Heavenly Peace.
Go to iTunes Store, look for We Got Angels, Harry Versluijs, you’ll find We Got Angels, Heavenly Peace and Misschien Vannacht, produced by Gaston.
This is why I write, because there are so many things so much More Important Than Music, my children, my wife, my friends and the people I love, all the way to China, who don’t know me but they kept me alive, that is why I want to sing. Stick with me now, I want to say “Thank you all” even if it turns us into personae non grata, some one has to say
THANK YOU
THANK YOU THANK YOU –
without you I would be somewhere else, some one else, I would probably not want to know - I might not even be alive today.
Only yesterday airways have opened up from Taiwan to China, for the first time in 60 years, today Hu Jia receives a dubious Award, Cui Jian is on My Space, Bei Dao lives in California, Chai ling went to Harvard if I’m not mistaken, today the man in front of the tank hasn’t been found yet, he disappaered into the crowd, and tomorrow some agent in China will start rummaging about in 20 year old files when I publish these words, for now only to be read by you, because you are friends of friends, More Important Than Music.
Me.
We-
Let’s take a deep breath now -
there are so Many Things More Important Than Music- even though it’s all we have. Yehudi Menuhin once said:”We may never achieve real peace, peace comes in bits and pieces, at best when we play we may have a few minutes of genuine Peace”.
Let’s do this!
Love you!
Harry V